Remembering Our Children

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What is a Chaplain

We all experience loss throughout the course of our lives. Children moving into a new home experience the loss of friends at the old school and the comforts of a familiar home. Children experience loss when parents divorce or grandma dies. They can feel loss as they move from childhood into adolescence; when it is no longer cool to play with dolls or other “childish” toys or games.

When a child is sick, regardless of whether the condition is minor or lifethreatening, parents experience profound loss. Grief is the natural reaction to any loss. There is no “right” way to grieve, but when we feel grief it is important that we, both as children and adults, have the ability to find the strength within us to express our grief in ways that heal us and help us grow into loving human beings.

This is where a chaplain can help.

Many people have an outdated view of what a Chaplain is and what a chaplain does. I have seen fear in people’s eyes when I am introduced as the chaplain because they think I am there just to “give last rights.” A chaplain can be anything from a pastor helping a family with their religious rituals, to a friend providing a shoulder during a difficult time. A chaplain is not necessarily religious and we do not promote any particular religion or faith. Our job can be to reconnect you and your family back to a lost faith or help you find a faith that works for you. Mostly a chaplain can help you find hope and strength during your greatest hour of need, helping you come to terms with loss, find and redefine hope and healing.

Article contributed by Rev. Ruben Escobar, Central Coast Visiting Nurses Association
Children's Hospice & Palliative Care Coalition www.ChildrensHospice.Org